She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
We had sex on a dog bed..
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
