absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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