I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
