i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
