i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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