I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
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