pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
