I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
