you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize
