Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
