Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize