just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
why is half of my head shaved?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
