woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
