So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
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