Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
babies were throwing up all over the place
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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