there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
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