real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
My vagina just clenched in fear
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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