Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.

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  (314): I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant. http://tfl.nu/hikv
  Replies (1) Good night (2122) Bad night (804)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.

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  (248): i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding. http://tfl.nu/2d2l
  Replies (35) Good night (1728) Bad night (6701)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles

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  (972): it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles http://tfl.nu/ysqd
  Replies (26) Good night (1247) Bad night (5287)
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  (415): View more from California

  Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.

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  (415): Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle. http://tfl.nu/saxv
  Replies (7) Good night (3842) Bad night (1262)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.

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  (905): If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too. http://tfl.nu/2teh
  Replies (21) Good night (1254) Bad night (4426)
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  (61): View more from Australia

  Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed

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  (61): Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed http://tfl.nu/qr9l
  Replies (10) Good night (4790) Bad night (1082)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling

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  (207): I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling http://tfl.nu/w1qs
  Replies (15) Good night (3246) Bad night (792)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame

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  (952): and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame http://tfl.nu/7sdj
  Replies (4) Good night (2128) Bad night (723)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.

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  (601): It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face. http://tfl.nu/wypl
  Replies (9) Good night (3282) Bad night (864)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.

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  (612): i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough. http://tfl.nu/e9ws
  Replies (1) Good night (1216) Bad night (933)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds

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  (609): I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds http://tfl.nu/e8hx
  Replies (4) Good night (636) Bad night (353)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.

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  (513): My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck. http://tfl.nu/0395
  Replies (3) Good night (889) Bad night (373)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.

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  (432): Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it. http://tfl.nu/j4lk
  Replies (1) Good night (639) Bad night (482)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  No this is saxophone Chris

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  (804): Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris? (215): No this is saxophone Chris http://tfl.nu/wuq2
  Replies (10) Good night (1477) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me

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  (616): Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me http://tfl.nu/4npo
  Replies (3) Good night (411) Bad night (156)

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