dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
