I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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