Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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