This girl is more easily done than said...
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
