dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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