awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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