yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize