Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
