still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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