The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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