Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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