Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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