I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
