I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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