One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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