so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
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