its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
