I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
