I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
