this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Couch. On fire.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
