I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Just cropdusted the office
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone owes me an orgasm
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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