ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I have feelings that need drinking.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
