And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I just blew my weed a kiss
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
