party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
