her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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