you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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