the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
