Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
