____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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