I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
