I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize