marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
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